Lost Girl: Aston Creek High (Book 2) Read online

  “We can,” I insist, searching his gaze and praying that I can find even a sliver of hope within them. “We can get through this. We’re going to be fine.”

  I find his hands and lace my fingers through his, not wanting to let go as he shakes his head. “How can you say that?” he questions softly, the pain shining through his eyes so much stronger than the sun above. “Even if I could get past the fact that you betrayed me, how am I supposed to be with you knowing that I’m his son? The man who gave me life attacked you and my mother. I share his blood. How could I possibly subject you to that? You need to be away from me. You should be running for the fucking hills not trying to cling onto yet another connection to him. I’ll never be free of him, but you can.”

  After the night filled with tears, I didn’t think it was possible for me to ever cry again, but tears spring to my eyes and I do everything in my power to hold them back. I don’t want to be that pathetic girl who breaks down and cries over a man. Despite last night being a completely different situation, Slade saw more tears than I’ve ever allowed another human being to witness and that was already more than I could handle. I can’t be vulnerable like that again. I won’t.

  I’m strong. Independent.

  “You can’t say that,” I tell him, bringing our hands between us and holding them tight. “You’re not him. You were raised by parents who love and adore you. You weren’t raised to be a monster like him. You were raised with a kind heart, good morals, and the ability to care. He doesn’t possess any of that. You. Are. Nothing. Like. Him.”

  His eyes flutter closed for the briefest moment before opening them with resignation. “You’re wrong,” he murmurs. “If you weren’t there last night, I would have killed him. I couldn’t stop thinking about it. I wanted to curl my fingers around his neck and squeeze it until all signs of life left his body. Is that the kind of man you want to be with? He said so himself, I’m just like him. I may have been raised differently, but I share his blood. It’s part of my DNA, a part of who I am.”

  “Don’t,” I tell him. “It’s one thing to push me away, but trying to convince yourself that you’re anything like that man is insane. How can you not see it? I know him. I’ve spent thirteen years with him and I know damn well, that you are nothing like that.”

  “How can you not see it?” he shoots back at me.

  “Because I know you,” I rush out, hating the traitorous tears as they fall to my cheeks. I press my finger into his chest, feeling the desperation starting to crush me. “I didn’t fall in love with someone like that. I fell in love with this incredible man sitting before me, with the man that I know you are, not this insane version that you’re trying to convince yourself that you are. That’s not you.”

  His head falls back against the house as his chest rises and falls with rapid movements. He stares at me, holding my gaze hostage, neither one of us ready to look away.

  A whole minute of silence passes when he takes my hips and lifts us both off the ground. He gently grazes his lips over mine before dropping his forehead to mine. “You’re not in love with me, Virago. You just want to be.”

  With that, he starts to pull away and I stare after him, unable to catch my breath.

  Slade starts making his way down the sidewalk and is just passing the boundary line of my property when I call out to him. “Wait,” I call over a lump in my throat. He turns back and what I see in his eyes nearly breaks me. He’s broken and I realize that saying those words tore him apart. Maybe he is capable of love after all.

  He waits patiently as I take a few steps toward him, refusing to get any closer to the man who’s intent on breaking my heart. “Your mom…” I start. “There may be a whole lot of unresolved shit between us right now, but at least stop hurting her. She’s been through enough. She’s worried about you.”

  “Stay out of it, Sky. This is between me and my mom.”

  “I can’t, Slade. I know what she’s feeling. I know what it’s like to lose you and I sure as hell know what it’s like to have your innocence stolen by that man, to be left feeling ashamed and scared. Yes, she kept this from you to protect you from the truth, and yeah, I know it sucks, but hasn’t she been through enough?” I take a breath and another step toward him. “I get it, okay, keep punishing me if it makes each day easier for you, but stop hurting her. She’s been dealing with this for over twenty years and she’s scared, so fucking scared, Slade. He’s coming for her just as much as he’s coming for me and instead of being there for her and letting her know that no matter what, you’re going to protect her, you’re pushing her away.”

  Despite my speech being over, Slade still remains, standing way over by the boundary line, looking as though I just slapped him in the face, and seeing as though I now have nothing to lose. I decide to keep going.

  I walk over to my sketchpad and pencils and as I scoop them out of the grass, I meet his eyes once again. “She told me about it the morning I first slept at your place. She didn’t mean to tell me as much as she did but I forced it out of her. I wanted to tell you so bad but I knew I couldn’t. It wasn’t my secret to tell.”

  I walk towards him with caution, almost as though he’s a scared animal that could run at any second and when I step in front of him, I take his hands, rubbing my thumb over his bruised knuckles. “Every day I wished she would find the courage to tell you. I know how damn hard it is to share that with anyone, especially someone you love and I’m so damn proud of her finally taking that step and letting you in. Surely you know that it was never my intention to hurt you. I had a decision to make and deep down, you know I made the right one.”

  He watches me for a moment, not saying a word as he turns his hand in mine and brings it to his lips. He presses a gentle kiss to the top of my hand and then places it back by my side as though it’s fragile.

  His eyes come to mine one more time and then with one painful beat, he turns around and walks away. “Slade,” I call one last time, watching as he looks back over his shoulder. “You’re wrong, I do love you and I’m not going to give up on this.”

  His eyes bore into mine and not being able to handle watching him walk away again, I turn and leave, hoping that he has it within himself to forgive me.

  Chapter 16

  I sit beside Nessa as I stare across the cafeteria at Slade with a heaviness that sits on my heart.

  His mom called me yesterday and explained that Slade had finally come around and that they talked. She thanked me for speaking with him and honestly, it was the best damn news I’ve heard in a long time. If only he was able to do the same for me.

  Just my luck that the first time I tell a man that I’m in love with him, he tries telling me that I’ve got it all wrong. Who does that? What kind of response is that? I was prepared for an emotional kiss or even the awkward ‘thank you,’ but flat out telling me that I was wrong. Screw him. I know what I’m feeling and deep down, despite feeling that he’s too cruel for love, I also feel that maybe I could be wrong too. Maybe I judged him too quickly.

  Slade Cruz is definitely cruel, but that side of him only comes out when he’s trying to protect someone or when he’s been betrayed, and unfortunately for me, I’ve been on the receiving end of both of those situations.

  I’ve come to know him pretty damn well over the past few weeks, and I don’t just mean every crevice of his body. Every single day, I find something new about him that captures me just that bit more. The way he plays basketball, the way he always finds my eyes in a busy room, his smile, the way his hands are always fidgeting except for when there’s a basketball in them, then he’s bouncing it.

  There are so many little things that pull me in. I’m not going to lie, I’m one of those girls who was first drawn in by his appearance and that sexy alpha ego that surrounds him. I was drawn to the hype and the fear, I was drawn to the way he was able to make me forget the bad and replace it with goosebumps that roam over my skin, but then, he let me in and I was drawn to his heart like a moth to a flame. />
  It kills me that he compares himself to Lucien Valentine. He’s nothing like him and I could tell him that until I was blue in the face but he’d never believe me. He’s far too stubborn for that shit.

  Nessa groans from beside me and I welcome her distraction. Anything is better than this pathetic moping over a big swamp turd who may or may not be oblivious to the fact that I’m in love with him.

  “What?” I grumble, stealing my eyes away from Slade’s way too heavy ones, desperate for her to start talking so I can get my mind away from my irritating reality.

  “Rachel Freaking Carter.”

  My brows draw down as I glance across the cafeteria to the girl in question. “What’s your issue with her?” I ask as we watch her prance across the cafeteria like the princess she claims to be.

  “She’s next on my list,” Nessa explains with a sigh, clearly not too pleased.

  “You mean your ‘somehow get everyone I’ve ever wronged to like me again’ list?”

  “Yep. That’s the one,” she says. “Kirsten got her extensions put in yesterday and loved them then somehow got a mani/pedi out of me too. Though I’d deny it if you ever repeat this, but it was kind of worth it. You should try it one of these days. Being kind actually makes you feel pretty damn good.”

  Booming laughter comes up and surprises the shit out of me and I don’t know whether it’s because she’s suggesting I should try being nice or because she’s about to attempt the impossible.

  I skip straight over her ‘kind’ comments and go for the juicy stuff. “Dare I ask what you did to Rachel for her to put you on her shit list?”

  Nessa grins and for a moment, it’s nearly as devilish as one of Damian’s. “What haven’t I done to that girl?”

  “Seriously?”

  “Oh, yeah. The first I can remember was in grade four when she asked to borrow some hand sanitizer, but she would ask me every single day and use it all up, so I sort of filled it with super glue.”

  She laughs to herself as I suck in an intrigued breath. “You didn’t.”

  “Yeah, her hands were glued down on the table for most of the day. Our teacher had to hand feed her lunch while the school nurse tried to free her. They were there for hours.”

  “Bullshit,” I laugh.

  “I swear to God,” she says, holding her hand over her heart. “It’s been war ever since then, but she brings it on herself. She’s a self-righteous bitch. She puts on this fake, innocent smile and pretends to be a victim, but we all know that she’s the devil in disguise.”

  “And you want to make up with her?”

  “I have no choice. It’s on my list.”

  “Shit, I can burn the list if you want me to. We can pretend it never happened.”

  “No,” she groans, getting up and then pulling on my arm. “Come on, we have to do this.”

  “Woah,” I say, yanking my arm back out of her grip. “No one said anything about ‘we.’ This is all you, baby.”

  “Come on,” Nessa pleads. “This’ll never work if I go in alone. She’s going to jump straight down my throat with the rest of the cheer skanks, at least with you by my side, she’ll pause long enough to maybe hear me out.”

  I scrunch my face, so not wanting to do this. I’ve always prided myself on being a loyal person, despite what Slade currently thinks. If Nessa and I are going to have a shot at a great friendship, then I need to have her back just as I’d hope she’d have mine.

  “Fine,” I say, stepping out from behind the table. “Do you even have a game plan or are you just winging it?”

  “Are you going to go running for the hills if I told you that I was going to wing it?”

  I consider her statement for a short second. “I don’t know,” I tell her. “I wouldn’t go running for the hills either way. If you fuck it up, you’re going to be known as the one who can’t close, but if you miraculously pull this off, you’ll forever have my respect.”

  “Well, damn. I didn’t realize we were upping the stakes.”

  “Gotta keep it interesting,” I wink.

  “Speaking of keeping things interesting,” she murmurs, lowering her voice so the tables we’re weaving through don’t overhear our conversation. “That whole turning Slade blue thing, that wasn’t you, was it?”

  I grin wide and not another word is needed.

  “I fucking knew it,” she cheers. “That was so fucking epic. I was sitting there through that whole damn game trying not to laugh at him.”

  At the mention of Slade, I find my gaze sweeping across the cafeteria to find him and I’m not surprised to find his intense stare already on me. As we start approaching Rachel and our target becomes obvious, his eyes narrow in suspicion. We take one more step in Rachel’s direction and his control slips.

  Slade throws himself from his chair, clutching onto the back of it as though it has the power to keep him grounded. I shake my head at him. I know Rachel is unpredictable and has a mean streak, but high school bitches are my forte. Besides, I don’t need his protection, I can handle myself. If anything, Slade Cruz has one important lesson to learn in life; he needs to stay in his own damn lane.

  I guess it doesn’t matter anyway. If I’m no longer Slade’s girlfriend, then I don’t need to play nice with Rachel because Damian likes to use her as a fuck toy. I mean, I’m still friends with Damian so technically I should be respecting it, but I really don’t think Damian would give a fuck if I had an issue with her. Hell, he’d be the first one on the sidelines, cheering us on and praying for a catfight while throwing bikinis and jello at us.

  After what feels like forever, Rachel finally notices us coming and by the time we reach her, I have an imposing asshole standing at my back. I jam my elbow back into him, letting him know exactly what I think of him being here, but he’s quick to catch it and force it back by my side.

  I don’t get to focus on the feel of his skin on mine for long as Rachel looks over us and instead of the scared, nervous tension that should be radiating off her, she grins. “Took you long enough.”

  “What took long enough?” Nessa questions, throwing out the same very question that I was only moments from asking.

  Slade’s hand drops to my waist but instead of it being the gentle caress of needing to hold me, it feels more like a grip, holding me back in case I feel like lashing out. My hand falls on top of his and when I try to push it off me, his grip only tightens until I have no choice but to leave it. Though to be honest, I’m not exactly complaining.

  I keep my hand over his and as he feels the pressure disappear from mine, his grip loosens. His fingers weave up through mine and my heart instantly races, wondering what the hell this could mean.

  Rachel acts as though Nessa didn’t say a damn word and turns her gaze on me, smirking with pride. “My video,” she admits. “You liked it, didn’t you? It was pretty fucking good. Though, I’m a little disappointed it’s taken you this long to figure it out. It’s not as though I made it hard. There was practically a trail of breadcrumbs, but I have to admit, I’m annoyed that I haven’t received the recognition that I deserve.”

  Slade’s hand squeezes again pulling me back as I go to take a step forward. Nessa glances up at me and without saying a word, I know exactly what she’s trying to tell me - fuck this bitch and my goddamn list.

  With everything that’s been happening over the past two weeks, I’d nearly forgotten all about that damn video. After Slade’s warning to the school, not one person has even dared speak about it, yet here we are and I’ve got a score to settle.

  My fists pump with adrenalin as the horrid emotions that video caused me begin to resurface. I’ve been humiliated in many ways but that video was brutal.

  It all becomes so damn clear to the point that I feel like an idiot for not seeing it before. Rachel was there every single time. She’s the one that’s been following me around like some kind of stalker. She’s the creep. Hell, she was even there that afternoon when Slade and I came tumbling out of the supply clo
set.

  “You know,” I say, not wanting to admit that I hadn’t actually worked out that it was her. “I did like your video, in fact, I loved it.” Rachel’s eyes narrow and I allow her to see the real me, the one who’s faced hell, the one who’ll take no prisoners. “I never got a chance to thank you properly.”

  As if on cue, Damian appears behind her while Slade drops his hand and moves to my side, silently letting me know that he’s not going to hold me back. Nessa moves around and within moments, they’ve formed a circle around us. No one in, no one out.

  It’s like letting a rabid animal loose on a little kitty, and damn it, I’m going to enjoy this.

  Sensing what’s going on, Rachel’s eyes grow wide and it’s clear that in the many ways this could have gone, never did she expect an actual ass-kicking. Girls like her with bitchy mouths are hoping for some petty war with nasty words, but not me. I handle my business just a little differently.

  Rachel glances back at Damian, silently asking for his help, but Damian is loyal to a T, and now that she’s admitted to attacking one of his own, their little arrangement is over. Not to mention, Damian was also put on blast in that video so if she had hoped that she’d still come out with him on her team, she was sorely mistaken.

  Damian takes a step back and everyone standing behind him instantly moves back, terrified to get in his way. Slade does the same and the movement has students scrambling to get out of his way. Nessa follows the boys lead and gets some sort of movement from the onlookers but nowhere near the same reaction as the boys got, but really, I couldn’t care less because the circle around us has suddenly become my ring, one that not even the strongest man would risk entering.

  Rachel’s eyes come back to mine in a panic and as I watch her, I realize that this is my chance to finally prove to the sorry bitches of this school that messing with me comes with consequences.

  I let my lips pull up into an excited grin and upon seeing the crazy beneath my eyes, she runs.

  Slade intercepts her and throws her back at me, knowing I need this more than anything else in this world.